I've been spending quite a bit of time online this past week, exploring possible vacation destinations for the future.

While reading a message board from one of the cities, a board populated by American and Canadian expats, it struck me what a truly amazing tool the Internet has become in what has been a short amount of time.

Twenty years ago it would be extremely hard, if not impossible to get instant, in-depth information about a city half way across the globe. Outdated, superficial stuff intended for tourists and history buffs, sure. Up to the minute information about a brand spankin new restaurant on an out of the way street, impossible.

This wealth of information of course covers all aspects of our lives, good for so much more than just travel.

Heck, everything one could ever want to know about BDSM and female domination is right here, free for the taking. Just imagine how hard it would have been to get good solid information about female domination as recently as 1980. Ronald Reagan doesn't seem all that long ago, but the volume and quality of information we all have at our fingertips now would have been unimaginable to most adults during his Presidency I think.

Change is I suppose a constant in our lives. Perhaps sometimes we dwell upon and remember negatives brought about by change, but we should also remember the positives, the truly wonderful enhancements to our lives that change brings.

Posted by Milliscent at 1:08 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

It's a sad fact, but true, that people live freely in our society who shouldn't. Who are indeed valueless and whom society would be better off without. Evil people.

It seems to me that people who are cruel to the dogs that love them are just about the worst. I've encountered that a couple of times in my life, and I must say that it pisses me off horribly.

One time, many years ago now, I arrived at my little cabin in the woods to find an old dog living on the porch. I hadn't been there in some weeks, and he was almost dead from starvation. Some food and love were immediately dispatched, and the dog was extremely friendly and gentle.

Unfortunately, he had hip disease and could not be saved.

What had happened though was that some asshole would not provide either the medical attention the dog needed, or humanely euthanize it. Instead this prince of a person dropped it off in the woods, probably telling the children that it would love being free to roam. Of course it wasn't free to roam, it was only free to starve on my porch.

This morning when I woke up I heard a dog barking, but didn't think much of it. When the barks continued for hours though I decided that we had better go and investigate, make sure that the dog was not in distress.

Well, we found the dog, lying in the weeds, apparently run over by a car.

The asshole that hit the dog didn't bother to stop and run him to the vet it seems. The asshole that owns the dog has made no effort to locate him it seems, and to top it off the asshole that owns the dog had no tag on his collar.

We've provided him with food, water, and comfort. Luckily we were also able to make contact with an animal rescue that is now on the way to rescue him and provide medical attention.

Posted by Milliscent at 3:37 PM | Permalink | Comments (6)

Eagles, Elks, Moose, Masons, Rotary, Kiwanis, Lions, Yacht, and special interest clubs. These organizations have in the past been a vital part in our society, providing tremendous benefit to their members and localized assistance to the communities in which they were active.

A couple of generations ago Americans were joiners. Membership in clubs large and small was widely sought out, and one must assume greatly appreciated. We seem to have largely lost that desire with the baby boom generation, and those generations that are following it.

I fear that this is a negative trend.

I fear that we are becoming more and more a nation that interacts with our electronic gadgets more than we interact with our fellow human beings. Man is a social animal, and I wonder what will become of man if due to neglect the ability to socialize with others becomes extremely limited.

Its been said by others that the baby boomers are the generation that refused to acknowledge that they would ever grow old or ever die. That refusal notwithstanding they are getting old, and they will die. I fear that process given that so many have not forged the social bonds needed to have a wide and strong support network.

My grandparents are in a Retired Kiwanis group in their local town. I've been dragged, kicking and screaming to a meeting or two through the years. Each weekly meeting begins with a check for who is not present. If someone knows why they are not present it is reported and if they are sick or otherwise in distress people volunteer to go and check up on them, rendering comfort and assistance as needed. If no one knows why they are not present, especially if they live alone, steps are taken to quickly get people to the house in order to ensure that they have not been hurt or had some kind of emergency. No member of this group will spend years in a nursing home waiting in vain for visitors who will never arrive.

I fear what happens instead to the person who, in his or her younger days, did not become an active member of such a social network. Who might, someday, be left elderly, and utterly alone.

Creating a social network for our older days is I think very much like financially planning for our retirement. We can't put it off to do when we get old, for then it is too late. It may require some sacrifices when we are young that we would rather not make, but if we wish happiness later those sacrifices must be made. Both things, financial and social planning are I think vital to the success of our later days, and I am concerned about the fact that social planning seems to be neglected by so very many in this time.

Perhaps it is just a continuation of poor financial planning, the savings rate in this country is dismally low, but I do believe that both of these needs must be planned for if we are to expect joyous and fulfilling lives as elder adults.

Posted by Milliscent at 8:35 AM | Permalink | Comments (16)

It seems that from the moment I purchased my Airstream a bit over three years ago I started joining clubs. I'm not the kind of person to join clubs, so it is odd behavior for me, but alas each of the clubs I've joined offers something of value to me and I've deemed each of them worth the cost.

In the Airstream world the big club is the WBCCI. Membership in it is what results in those big red numbers on the front and back of Airstream trailers. I joined the club because doing so allows me to visit club facilities, one of which is extremely convenient for me. I also joined because the club was founded by the inventor of Airstream, Wally Byam, has existed almost as long as the iconic trailers themselves, and is a good way to celebrate the heritage of the brand.

WBCCI is not however for everyone. It is an old club, run primarily by elderly folks, and is steeped in tradition and rules, most of which seem to bother just about everyone under the age of seventy. For that reason it is shrinking at an alarming rate. Older members, who enjoy the club as it is, are dying. Younger members seem to join when they purchase their first Airstream, but are quickly turned off by the formality of it and don't seem to renew. It's gone from 28,000 members to 6,000 members in a strikingly short period of time.

Online, Airstream owners have a superb gathering place. Air Forums which is 40,000 members strong and from which one can learn everything there is to know about Airstreams and the people who own them.

In the years of my membership there I've been reading a virtual flood of complaints about the WBCCI. I've read countless posts about what is perceived to be wrong with the club, why people refuse to renew their membership in it, and how it should be run differently in the poster's opinion. It seems though that the thousands of complainers never take the initiative to either work within the club to bring about desired change, or to start a new club that better suits their vision.

Very recently there has been a bright spot in this sorry state of affairs. A well-respected member of the Airstream community started a new club. TAC. The only stated purpose of TAC is to 'have fun.' No hierarchy, no rules, no dues. Any member can simply post online about an event he or she is planning and folks can attend or not as their whims dictate. TAC is to be a completely volunteer organization.

I've been watching this with a great deal of interest. Last night, on the forums I read a most interesting series of posts about TAC.

One particular woman in the Midwest, let's call her C, is a WBCCI member, but through my years reading the forums she has been a extremely frequent and vocal poster about all that is wrong with the WBCCI. I've always felt some of her points to be valid, others not so. As a result of reading her posts for three plus years now, I wasn't surprised to see her extremely excited by the formation of TAC, and not surprised to see her name among the very first people to join. TAC is of course a blank slate, a new club for its members to make in their own vision; I presumed it perfect for someone with such strong opinions.

A few days ago one of the organizers of TAC mentioned on the forum that web hosting costs a few bucks, and that while he had paid for the first year, in future years it might be necessary to ask for donations to cover that cost.

Well, that was the end of C. She publicly asked to have her membership dropped in TAC, citing the perceived fact that the club was sold as a dues free, pay as you go organization, but that it might ask for donations to cover the few costs involved. She decided that the founders had deceived her into joining, and lied about the costs for doing so.

Of course one can give a donation or not, so her arguments are spurious at best.

This story is I suppose my way of making a couple of points, one more important than the other, but I think both valid.

I think that the best clubs are the clubs in which one must be approved for membership. Such policies keep the deadbeats and lunatics out.

Secondly, and more importantly, while C is an extreme example, I think her story can remind us all of a fundamental lesson in life. One can either sit back and complain, leading a negative life or one can enjoy the good in everything and lead a positive life. The second is much more fun and will bring forth joy for oneself and others. It is too bad that extremely negative people such as C exist in our world, but if we remain positive and have fun, we can certainly limit their influence in our lives.

Posted by Milliscent at 9:58 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

It seems to me that a marriage, if it is to be a long one, requires realistic expectations. Life is not a television show, nor can dreams ever truly be reflective of reality.

In my view, a successful long-term marriage will not be infused with never ending passion, a lifelong bliss of joy and feelings of love. I don't think it can happen that way, indeed, I think that the chemical reactions that take place in our brains to create those feelings of bliss have time limits, end eventually for any relationship. Life is not one hugely blissful happy ending.

I think that our extremely high divorce rate results exactly from these unrealistic expectations.

What is a good, long-term marriage?

In my view it is a mutual affection, and a mutual striving towards similar goals by two people who are there for each other. It is two people who will stand together against the cruelties of the world, supporting each other as they do so. It is two people who by knowing each other so well, and sharing an abiding mutual affection and intimacy will be able to help each other deal with and get through the most horrific parts of life that we must all face at some point. It is two people, aging together, protecting each other from the ravages of time and the ever-changing circumstances of our lives.

That is, I think, love.

The other is a chemical reaction in our brains.

By not confusing the two, we just might be able to make our marriages happier, and make them last.

Posted by Milliscent at 2:10 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

Champions of the World

No spankings for those who argued on behalf of the Colts!

Posted by Milliscent at 6:45 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Jets Defeat The Colts

Vikings Defeat The Saints

Posted by Milliscent at 12:02 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

Jets, Patriots, Cowboys, and Packers emerge from the Wild Card Round.

Posted by Milliscent at 2:55 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

While reading The Edge of Vanilla today, I ran across the post:

Take it, Bitch

The post shows an image of a t-shirt, apparently made by boosters of a High School football team down in Texas, where they take their football very seriously.

The team in question must be the Mustangs or the Colts for their mascot is a horse, and quite obviously not a gelded horse. Their bitter rivals are shown to be the Spartans.

The t-shirt depicts two horses and a Spartan cheerleader. She is on her hands and knees, pleasuring horse number one with her mouth as horse number two takes her from behind.

This is remember, High School football. The t-shirt is without a doubt over the top and very wrong given that context.

In another context, if it were not associated with High School sports, one would have to admit that the image is powerful and could be a strong fantasy driver for many.

While clearly inappropriate for the young people it was created for, adults could certainly appreciate and enjoy the image. I imagine that many readers of this blog, after visiting "Take it, Bitch" will dream of being on their knees, dream of being the 'cheerleader' in the image.

As each of us moves through life we run across images and phrases that become erotic triggers for us, things that we never loose the memory of, things upon which our fantasies are built. This image, with it's wide dissemination will I imagine become such a fantasy driver for some people who come across it. These fantasy triggers are always interesting to me as is contemplation of our larger cultural influences that lead to their creation.

So Wrong, for High School kids.

So Fun, for adults kinky dreams.

Context and intention are always key.

Posted by Milliscent at 3:29 PM | Permalink | Comments (6)

Most of my friends know that I read a great deal and as a result a number of books sometimes come to me that I would not have selected myself. Last week such a book arrived on my shelf, and in the mood for something strange I gave it a read.

The book was about Masons, specifically the evil that Masons do. Obviously the author, and the book are a bit more than a little nuts, but it was interesting to read the author's conspiracy theories anyway.

A bit of looking around the internet reveals that lots of people are convinced that the Masons are involved in conspiracy, and I must assume that the belief is a result of the fact that they believe Freemasonry to be a 'secret society.'

I wonder, what is it about secrets that make people seemingly automatically deem evil intention behind them? Could it be envy by those who feel slighted because they are not in on the secret, whatever it may be? Could it be some kind of dogmatic view that nothing of the good ever needs to be kept a secret?

I found this to be especially odd because Freemasonry is surely not a secret, no matter how many times the author assured himself, and his readers of the fact that it is a 'secret society.' Here in Washington State we have special license plates for Masons, one sees them on cars fairly frequently, right along with the Square and Compass symbol on bumper stickers, or even the Eastern Star. It seems that every little town across our nation has it's Masonic Lodge with it's own building, plainly marked with signage for all to see. Men proudly wearing a Masonic ring with a big red stone walk every Main Street in America. What is the secret? Where is the secret? Wouldn't a successful and powerful conspiracy as outlined by Anti-Masonic writers at least try to hide?

The writer of this particular book did of course have an explanation. In his view, most Masons are given no knowledge of the conspiracy; it is only an inner circle that truly knows the evil intentions of the organization. That the 'secret' rituals of the group over time bond the member to the group, and ensure that once he is given 'secret' knowledge of the conspiracy he is at a point at which the evil cannot be fought.

Of course, the 'secret' rituals of Freemasonry are all detailed in the book, as is the 'secret' knowledge of the conspiracy. All of this with footnotes pointing to other books published over the last hundred years or so.

Indeed, to actually believe the book one would have to believe two completely opposite things at the same time. One would have to believe that Masonic rituals are 'secret' as are it's true aims, but one would also have to believe that these 'secrets' truly remain secret after being written about countless times over a long period of history.

Certainly there have been periods in history when Masonry needed to guard itself, and secrecy would have been important. When the Catholic Church was in full pursuit of those it deemed heretics, outing oneself as a Mason likely would have been a very poor idea, as it would have been when Nazi Germany was doing it's best to rid Europe of Masons.

Beyond those considerations, the 'secrecy' aspect of Masonry was probably also extremely useful to those of our nations founding fathers who were Masons as the privacy of the lodge would have helped them plan the birth of our nation.

To somehow though stretch these legitimate needs for privacy into secrecy for evil intent as this book did is a stretch that a rational mind can't truly make in my view.

All of this brings me right back around to my initial wondering, what is it in human nature that causes so many of us to believe that secrets must have evil intent? I suppose that we shall never know, but it is an interesting question to ponder I think.

Posted by Milliscent at 2:14 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

Yesterday evening I attended a small, but certainly interesting erotic art show in Lowell, a very old suburb of the City of Everett. A rather odd place for an erotic art show, but I do hope it takes off and can grow in future years.

My favorite chastity device craftsman was even displaying his wares. Visit his website if you haven't done so in awhile, and while looking at his version of the Kali's Teeth Bracelet think about just how much fun the world could be if all the boys were outfitted with them!

Male Chastity Now

There was certainly more than one visual artist whose work I enjoyed, but one stood out to me for both its vibrancy and scale.

Greg Ballard

It looks like his website is just starting up now, but should expand with time.

Posted by Milliscent at 10:21 AM | Permalink | Comments (4)

Recycling is a huge fad now and in some ways I suppose that is good. Certainly it's not all superlative though.

Recycling of some items works extremely well. It's better for the environment, saves money, and results in products that people want to buy. Aluminum and Yard Waste come to mind as items that can be easily, and effectively recycled.

Other items though can end up costing more to recycle, using more resources than creating new, and indeed can have a greater negative impact on the environment than just disposing of the items. More information about inefficiently recyclable products can be found on the web.

It seems though that lots and lots of folks seek to recycle everything. They just assume that it's better to do so, and get good feelings about somehow doing their share for environmental protection. Certainly there's nothing wrong with doing so, but it remains a fundamental truth that some forms of recycling have tremendously greater positive impact than others.

Today was one of my annual recycling days. Not separating garbage into little bins, and certainly not hauling things to a recycling center. No, today was meaningful recycling day.

I, and this year a neighbor joined me, set up a yard sale of perfectly good things that we just don't need anymore. A yard sale with a twist though in that everything is free. I do this once a year and it benefits me by making room for new things in my little house, and it benefits those who end up with the stuff. Perhaps someone will be a bit warmer this winter, have a much-enjoyed convenience, or even an interesting book to read. As some of the people who live in my area are extremely poor the items never last long.

Perhaps best today was a beautiful vintage embroidered leather motorcycle jacket that went to a fourteen year old kid up the street. He will have something truly unique and spectacular to wear to school this winter, the envy of his class perhaps. That is in my view meaningful recycling, much more so than separating ones paper and plastic.

Posted by Milliscent at 3:47 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I've got a good friend who has been in a bad marriage for a number of years. What started out as good between them slowly changed into a marriage without intimacy and an ever more whiny and demanding situation. He hasn't been happy for a long time so I was pleased when I heard recently that she told him to take his dog and go.

This booting out of the house is the apparent result of her finding evidence of an affair.

It's an old story, repeated all too often in modern society.

What I find interesting though is what she decided about the breakup of the marriage, and the cause for the affair.

She didn't consider what the true causes of the failure could be rather she decided that he is mentally ill. Apparently in her mind she has decided that the only reason why he would not want to be with her is if he is mentally ill.

That's an ego that would put the bitchiest of dominatrices to shame!

Posted by Milliscent at 12:56 PM | Permalink | Comments (8)

This coming weekend is the Olympia Pride Festival. It should be a great time if you are looking for something to do.

Capitol City Pride

Posted by Milliscent at 9:48 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

We are very fortunate to live in the Puget Sound region, a place populated by people who are generally accepting of diversity, sexual and otherwise.

There are however of course exceptions. Bashing of sexual minorities and other crimes motivated by hate of otherness do occur. In some parts of our country it is much worse.

A national group with chapters in Seattle and Tacoma has an answer to the problem of bashing:

Pink Pistols

Cease Fear, Seattle

Pink Pistols Tacoma

Many will likely disagree with me, but I believe that the group's advocacy of self-defense is a key component of the quest to end the bashing of sexual and gender minorities once and for all.

In our great state of Washington all law-abiding adults have an absolute right guaranteed by law to possess firearms for self-defense. Additionally, all law abiding citizens of Washington have a right guaranteed by law to carry a pistol for self defense after acquiring the appropriate permit from local law enforcement. There is no discretion over the issuance of such permits, they will be granted in all cases in which one qualifies by being free of criminal conviction or serious mental health issues.

There are no doubt places in which it could be extremely dangerous for a transgendered individual to walk down that proverbial dark alley. Sometimes though that walk cannot be avoided. Does it not make sense to give oneself proper means of self-defense before doing so?

Posted by Milliscent at 11:08 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

I’m a member of a very large and active forum, well run, well moderated, chock full of great information.

The owner sells a bit of advertising on it, and he asks for donations from those who use it.

I could spend hours a day reading there the volume of content is so high, so I can’t imagine how long it must take him to keep it all humming. Hosting must also be extremely costly each month.

Yesterday I noticed someone posting, upset that the owner was asking for donations. Wanting to know where the money went, questioning if it were fair to ask for donations considering that the owner went on a costly vacation recently.

This perspective strikes me as very odd, yet it is also something I have seen online many times. For some reason there seems to be a large percentage of people out there who expect everything on the internet to be free. Who somehow believe that if ‘the site owner was really into bdsm, he wouldn’t be trying to make a buck off his forum.’

I must say that on a conceptual level, I can’t understand such views. Just because someone is making a buck or two off his fetish website doesn’t mean that he is any less of a true fetishist.

On a practical level it gets worse. If enough people hold these odd views then owners of wonderful sites will not have the resources to keep them going. We loose I think many tremendous fetish sites because people are unwilling to support them.

Visitors to a site that requests donations are of course under no obligation to donate, and I think that decision can be reasonably made either way. I don’t think it reasonable though to somehow become offended because a donation is asked, or to start believing that someone is not truly interested because he is asking.

Posted by Milliscent at 8:53 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

I’ve noticed an odd trend among parents today; it seems to me that people are almost fetishizing childhood innocence & safety. I can’t imagine that it is healthy for the children, and I have to wonder how these children who were obsessively protected by their parents will turn out when they finally reach adulthood.

I know of two different sets of grandparents who have been told that their grandchildren cannot see them drinking alcohol. I know of a mother who is convinced that her very young daughter was molested by the equally young neighbor girl because the two girls were observed ‘playing doctor.’ Lastly I know of a mother who does not allow ‘negative’ words such as death to be said around her children.

It seems that children today are not allowed outside without an adult chaperone. Gone forever are the days when one wandered off to play in the morning, returning home when it started getting dark.

It seems that parents today are convinced that there is a child predator around every corner. Gone forever are the days when children were able to visit a playground without having paranoid fears coursing through their parent’s minds.

Children in the past climbed trees, participated in dangerous sports, explored the wonders of nature. They crashed, sometimes broke bones, fell often with the skinned knees to prove it. They were allowed out of sight, growing up by being alone as their maturity level dictated. Are children allowed to do these things today, or are we as adults so worried about them that we try to protect them from every danger, hence not allowing them to live, to grow up?

When children are allowed to be children, to enjoy the world, are their heads so filled with the fears of their parents that they can’t actually have fun? Isn’t childhood supposed to be about just that, having fun?

Children fall out of trees, they get skinned knees. Children see and hear bad things. That is the nature of childhood. Are we as adults taking the joy out of childhood because we are so protective of our children that we disallow them from doing the things that make childhood worth living?

Lastly I must ask myself, are the fears adults feel for their children today even rational? Is the fear commensurate with the risk? Could it be that adults are so concerned over the safety of children that this ideal of safety, of innocence has become almost as a fetish within the adults in question? Are adults fetishizing childhood innocence, fetishizing childhood safety?

Clearly it is wrong for adults to allow children to be in overly dangerous situations. It is however equally wrong for an adults fears to prevent them from allowing their children to indeed be children.

Posted by Milliscent at 4:47 PM | Permalink | Comments (6)