You now have your partner cumming, cumming a-lot. Now it's time to train him or her to look towards you for sexual direction, for sexual permission.

What you want is for your partner to begin expecting your direction when it comes to his or her sexual expression, and equally important you want your partner to become used to obeying your direction. Ultimately you want his or her obedience to become ingrained and automatic.

This is easier to accomplish than might be expected but will require a change of mindset and behavior on both your parts so is best done gradually.

You want to get to a place at which your word is law, but with a vanilla partner starting out with bold and cold orders will not be effective. Instead you want to slowly train that partner into expecting and accepting orders.

You might say, in the beginning, something like:

"Jesus baby, I get so hot watching you masturbate. Will you do something for me? Please kneel here by at my feet and play with that beautiful rod, I want to see your hot cum spurting onto my sexy shoes."

Later, after your previously vanilla partner is used to accepting your direction you would say something much different, perhaps:

"Kneel down beside me. Get out your cock and beat off. I want you to cum as quick as you can, make sure that every drop lands on my sexy shoes."

In the beginning, arriving home from work, you might:

Take your lady in hand, turning her back to you and whisper in her ear about how hot she makes you. Whispering direction for her to pull up her skirt and drop her panty before bending over the back of the sofa for a long hard fucking.

Later you might:

Call her on your drive home, directing her to be nude, bent over the back of the sofa, with a wet and open cunt ready for fucking the moment you hit the door.

The trick is to train yourself to begin asking for exactly what you desire with each erotic encounter, and training your partner to respond to that which you ask.

Very gradually, over time, change the tone of the direction you give from soft, romantic, and sexy to direct, commanding, and no-nonsense.

In time your partner will be eager to obey your whims of fancy, and indeed if you are creative enough, look forward to the ever changing nature of those whims.

Posted by Milliscent at 10:37 AM | Permalink | Comments (6)

Regular readers may remember that some time ago I posted a personal ad here on the blog for a cuckoldress located across the country. This week she sent me the following words intended to be posted here on the blog:

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Posted by Milliscent at 2:52 PM | Permalink | Comments (6)

Once we have decided exactly what we desire our partner's sexual responses to be, and have committed ourselves to the goal of attaining that desire, the next step is to exert complete control over our partner's ability to orgasm.

Each step I will outline in this process is required to meet our goal, but it should be kept in mind that controlling our partner's climax is absolutely fundamental to our ultimate success. Skimping on this step will ensure failure.

Exerting this control should begin immediately, and be enforced with perfect consistency. We don't slowly begin controlling our partner's ability to cum, we control it period.

In my experience most female dominants with male submissives who control orgasm prefer to limit the male's ability to cum beyond what he would desire if left to make his own decision while most male dominants with female submissives prefer to require a greater frequency of orgasm from their females than she would desire if left to make her own decision. There are of course exceptions to this generality; female dominants who might say require male masturbation to orgasm five times a day or more, and male dominants who prefer to keep their female submissives in a more chaste state. Generally though the limited male and pushed female model holds true for most. Whatever you decide as a dominant is perfectly correct for your particular relationship, but there are differences to performing this step based upon the sexual behavior you seek to create.

Let us assume that you are a male dominant with a female partner and a goal of increasing your partner's sexual activity. First off you must make sure that she receives more frequency of orgasm than she would seek out on her own. Try to figure out how many times she cums per week when she directs her own sexual behavior. She fucks you, how many times does she cum doing it? She masturbates, how often does she do so? Does she fuck someone else on the side, cumming with him? We need a number, and you must do your best to figure out that number.

Once you know how many times she cums, per week, when directing her own sexual behavior, increase it, rather dramatically. If she is cumming five times a week on her own, start making her cum ten times a week. Fuck her more than she needs to fuck and make certain that she cums whenever you do so. Can't keep up yourself? Learn to provide her with orgasm in different ways. The important thing is that she cums, and cums much more often than her personal needs require.

This must be done because for the process to work you need to become her only means of orgasm. The process will not work if she is masturbating on her own, cuming without you, or if she is fucking others, cumming with someone else. You as the dominant need to be her sole provider of orgasm and one of the ways you do that is by making certain that she receives all she could ever possibly desire.

Perhaps that is not as easy as it sounds, but look on the bright side, the exercise will do you both good, so fuck that little slut until she screams!

This of course holds true if you are a female dominant seeking to create a male who experiences very large numbers of orgasms.

Conversely, let us say that you are a female dominant with a male partner and it is your intention to limit his orgasms. Again, you must first try to figure out how often he cums. He cums when he fucks you, he cums if he fucks anyone else, and he cums when he masturbates. Don't fool yourself about how often he masturbates. If he's a very young man he might do it three to five times a day, an old man probably does it at least daily, be honest with yourself when considering the question, and certainly don't ask him, he'll just lie about it.

Once you have a good idea about how often he is cumming, with you and without you, start providing him the opportunity to cum more often than that with you. No, you don't have to fuck him five times a day but you do have to provide him the opportunity to cum with you more often than he would do if left to make his own sexual decisions.

Ninety-Nine percent of the time the male is going to want to cum much more often than the dominant female is going to want to engage in sex, so a plan should be developed to ensure that he receives the needed frequency of orgasm without her having to do that which she does not desire.

Create masturbation games for the male. Tell him how turned on you get when he masturbates in front of you. Order him to drop his pants and masturbate. Give him a delicious body part to lick while he masturbates. Fuck him as often or as infrequently as you desire, cut him off from penetrative sex with you entirely if that is your desire, but make sure that he cums more often than he would do if left to make his own sexual decisions. If you think he cums twice a day on his own, make sure that he cums for times a day with you.

As a part of this process, ask him to only masturbate in your presence. Ask him to only cum while you are watching. Tell him how disappointed you would be to ever think of him spilling his cum without you there. Let him cum, force him to cum so often that he has no desire to cum without you, and constantly remind him how hot watching him cum makes you. Through your actions, and your words, you want to end up in a place in which he never has a desire to cum when not with you.

It is I know, counterintuitive to have a male whom one wants to put into enforced chastity cum so frequently, but remember, this is a long-term process and you as the dominant have years to reach your ultimate goal. For now, make him cum; just make sure that he is only cumming with you.

This too holds true if you happen to be a male dominant seeking to ultimately curtail your female's frequency of orgasm.

Step two, as I've outlined above is to make your partner associate his or her orgasm with you, is to become your partner's sole provider of orgasm, excluding even him or herself.

In the next post I'll talk about how to make good use of your little slut's fuck-holes as you continue controlling her climax, and conversely about how to begin limiting your boy's ability to climax if that is a part of your ultimate goal. Stay tuned.

Posted by Milliscent at 4:17 PM | Permalink | Comments (6)

This post is going to be a bit different from the norm on my blog. While I usually write about domination and submission, decidedly erotic roles, this post is going to be about sexual response itself. While I almost always write about female dominance and male submission, this post is about creating desired sexual response in one's partner, regardless of gender. Lastly, while my posts are generally self-contained, this is actually going to be a series of posts, a how-to that is overly long for one simple post here on the blog.

This is the first of multiple posts exploring the concept of creating the sexual response we desire in our partner, I hope that you enjoy it, and I hope that you will return to read the rest of the series as it is posted.

While I hope that this series is enjoyable and perhaps enlightening for everyone, it is specifically geared to dominants within a relationship. Not necessarily Mistresses and Masters in a stereotypical sense, but dominants as defined as those who wish to change their partner's sexual responses or behaviors in order to be more pleasing to the dominant, and who are willing to pursue that goal, perhaps ruthlessly.

To illustrate by example, let us say that 'Sharon' is in a long-term relationship with 'Jim.' Sharon has a wild and kinky side, while Jim is 100% pure vanilla. To her great sex is all about being with a man in panties, a sweet and sensitive crossdresser willing and wanting to humiliate himself while putting her erotic pleasure first. To the man she loves, great sex is all about 3.5 minutes giving oral sex, 3.5 minutes getting oral sex, and 2 minutes of intercourse. I say, indeed I know, that Sharon can change Jim's sexual response, Sharon can create within Jim that man in panties she desires. She can do this with time, patience, knowledge, and ruthlessness.

These techniques will work with virtually anyone, the only prerequisite is that they enjoy sex and have a healthy drive for it. Love a partner who is plain vanilla or who has kinks that differ from your own? Change him or her. Turn their sexual desire into exactly what you desire. It's a delightfully dominant and fulfilling thing to do. It'll also keep your sex life alive, something that is always important in a long term relationship.

Two caveats before we continue: Sorry, no, these techniques will not work for someone with submissive feelings to create a dominant. Secondly, these techniques take a great deal of time; they will not work in anything but a long-term relationship.

Consent is of prime importance in any dominant/submissive interaction and must be addressed when using these techniques. It is important for us as the dominant partner to know that we have the consent of our partner, but we also can't ruin our plan by overly dramatizing the need for consent.

An example: Let us say that we have a partner who has never been anally penetrated, but it is our desire that he come to the place of bending over and accepting baseball bat sized dildos driven deeply into his ass.

We are not going to gain his consent by asking: "Honey, I love sex with you, but I really want to strap on the hugest dildo I can find and fuck you in the ass till you scream. Is that OK with you?"

Instead we are going to gain his consent by going so slowly that he accepts each little baby step we take toward our ultimate goal. We are going to begin playing with his ass. Slowly, gently, pleasurably. We know, in our own minds that we are doing this so that we can turn him into the ultimate anal whore, but we certainly aren't going to tell him that, we are just going to as gently as possible move him down the path toward that ultimate goal. If he does not object, if he does not leave the relationship, we are going to assume that he consents to our slow, gentle, and pleasurable exploration of his ass. Each step we take will be so tiny that he will never even need to consciously recognize the changes he is undergoing at our hand.

If he does object, we have lost his consent and we will back off to a previous level. For that encounter only. We will, through our actions, seek his consent for what was previously objected to in an upcoming encounter and we will repeat the process until he reaches the exact sexual response we desire.

Ruthless? Yes, if one thinks about it. This is however a free country, he is free to leave the relationship if he desires. As long as he stays though, and as long as we desire him to stay, he will have his boundaries pushed, he will be driven along the path to our ultimate goal.

Now that I've gotten all that preliminary stuff out of the way, we have arrived at step one.

Step one just might be the hardest step of all, and interestingly enough, it does not include our partner. It is work that we must do on our own, within ourselves.

Step one is:

Deciding exactly what it is that you desire your partner to become. Exactly what should be his or her turn-ons; exactly what sexual response he or she should exhibit.

Today in my little flight of fantasy I picture a raven haired beauty, a sexy girl who will crawl to me nude, having already prepared herself for sex by clamping her own nipples, greasing and plugging her own ass. I picture her on her hands and knees, clamped, plugged, cunt wet and dripping, looking into my eyes, asking me to claim her as my whore, begging to be fucked, asking my permission for her own orgasm. All I must do in this little flight of fantasy is slide a penis gag into her mouth so that all her fuck-holes may be filled, and strap a dildo onto my hips so that she can ride herself to oblivion.

The above might be exactly what you desire, or maybe it's the crossdresser mentioned at the start of this post, likely though, it is something completely different. Whatever it is, you must decide.

What do you want? Exactly? Think about it. Spend some time figuring out your desires. Get it into your mind, burned deeply within, and decide that your partner will become that which you so desire.

I'll return with a future post explaining just how to get that which you want.

To be continued...

Posted by Milliscent at 4:01 PM | Permalink | Comments (6)