What the hell does dystopian mean?

A dystopia is the opposite of a utopia.

Who is distributing this oddly named book?

Dystopian Longings is being distributed by Smashwords. Smashwords is a genuine vanilla ebook distributor. This assures that your purchase information is safe, and gives you the ability to buy the ebook with any major credit card, or pay pal if you prefer. It also ensures that your credit card bill will show a large and legitimate vanilla business, not a kinky dominatrix.

At six bucks you aren't going to get rich so why are you bugging me to buy the damn thing?

Because I am proud of my writing, and I hope to share my stories with as many people as possible.

Why do you want me to take my precious time to review it for you when I could be off reading more porn?

Three reasons:
1. I'm proud of my writing and want to share it with as many people as possible. People who are unfamiliar with me though will not buy it unless it has some reviews.
2. Your honest feedback will help me to become a better writer.
3. I take my time to write something for you here every week. It's your turn to write something for me!

OK, I'll do it, but how?

It's easy! Create yourself an account on Smashwords.com (it's free and easy) then go to the book page and post your thoughts. It's even easier than commenting on this blog.

Why should I buy an ebook instead of a real book?

Because with an ebook there are no paper pages to get sticky when you masturbate while reading.

Will I masturbate while reading Dystopian Longings?

I certainly hope that you want to wank off while reading my book. If you do or not depends upon if you are in a chastity device or not I suppose. Either way, I'm sure that it will get some slime leaking out of you!

The book cover says that it's by Ms. Milliscent and F. Kettleman. Who the fuck is F. Kettleman?

The gent who helped me edit it so that you didn't have to read a misspelled and ungrammatical ebbok. He also helped me format it so that it would work well with so many different devices and computers. Let me tell you, that bit looked to be a nightmare. I think that it is a much better ebook than it would have been without that collaboration.

All right, I'm convinced. Where do I buy it again?

Right Here.

I'm a very good boy, so I'll do a review for you. Where do I do it?

Right Here.

I want my two bucks off you overpriced bitch. What's that coupon number again?

FM58P