Purging, An Unfortunate 'Fix' In Seattle
Our shared bdsm/fetish/gender desires are certainly outside the mainstream, certainly go unaccepted by society at large.
An unfortunate consequence of all of this is an overwhelming desire in some people to somehow make themselves 'normal.' To do away with their erotic desires and identity, replacing them with 'normalcy.' Of course this never works out and is the path to unhappiness, but it is an irrational impulse followed by many.
For crossdressers this usually entails the throwing away of all female clothing, related erotica, and whatever else has to do with gender play in the person's life. An overwhelming impulse to just throw it all away, in a desire to purge the need from one's life.
It doesn't work, and these things are slowly replaced, a collection built again until the next purge.
Countless dollars are thrown away in this manner every year by people all around this country.
If you are someone who purges in this way, I hope that next time the impulse to throw it all away overcomes you; you will stop to consider things for a while before giving in to the need to get rid of everything.
Consider that purging material things will not remove the desires or need from your life.
Consider that normalcy is a utopian fantasy, not realizable on this earth.
Consider that there is absolutely nothing wrong with consensual sexual expression between consenting adults or within oneself.
Consider that no consensual adult sexual expression is or can be immoral.
Consider that you are a unique and valuable individual, that your unique sexuality in no way devalues you or your life.
Consider that there is no valid guilt or shame that can be associated with consensual adult sexual expression.
Lastly, consider how badly you will miss those things you throw away later.
Accept yourself, embrace and enjoy yourself, be true to yourself. That is the only path to true joy.
Comments
Amen! Mistress, I have ridden that rodeo a few times. Thank you for helping me understand.
Posted by: Traci | September 7, 2009 8:26 PM
Purging is an awful thing. I have been a transvestite for 33 years, and have been able to avoid this behavior - but there have been times when I very seriously considered it.
I would recommend that, if you feel you must, do not make it a permanent thing; give what you have to a friend, to hold it, to give you six weeks or six months to think over what you're doing.
Posted by: Alexis | September 7, 2009 9:30 PM
traci,
I am sorry to read that it is something you have experienced. Let us hope that it is not something that you will have to go through again.
Remember, there are millions of people out there, just like you!
M
Posted by: Milliscent | September 7, 2009 10:59 PM
alexis,
I think that you give extremely wise advice.
Thank you!
M
Posted by: Milliscent | September 7, 2009 11:01 PM
I dont know much about cross dressers but your advice seems to be spot on as the Brits would say....we are what we are and no sense in trying to hide it or change it or make it go away as it always comes back
Posted by: bdenied | September 11, 2009 8:17 AM
This reminds me of the many times I tried to quit smoking. I did throw away a lot of cigarettes, only to buy more and continue.
Eventually I did quit smoking, but the analogy is not really true. Smoking was destructive. These sexual preferences are not necessarily so, excluding those that hurt other people.
Posted by: Susan's pet | September 11, 2009 4:03 PM
Thank You Mistress Milliscent for pointing out a rarely discussed issue, i wasn't aware of such behavior. Of course, they could always give their clothes to me, i could always use a new pencil skirt!
Posted by: bitch | September 12, 2009 9:17 AM
bdenied,
I agree 100%. Our inner natures and needs always return to us no matter how much damage we do to ourselves trying to deny them.
M
Posted by: Milliscent | September 13, 2009 11:24 AM
Susan's pet,
I find your analogy to smoking to be very interesting. Certainly it is similar.
I think though that the sexual needs are much more powerful than the smoking needs. One is it's true physically and psychologically addicting, but the other is inborn within us, and I must assume therefore much harder to ever hope to overcome.
Certainly your second point is correct as well. Consensual sexual expression between adults is harmless, in fact, beneficial. Most smoking on the other hand is harmful.
M
Posted by: Milliscent | September 13, 2009 11:28 AM
bitch,
I'm glad that you enjoyed the post.
As for new clothes, they are indeed always wonderful!
M
Posted by: Milliscent | September 13, 2009 11:29 AM